A Universe Not Theirs
by The Island Hopper
Summary: The most vicious aliens in the universe are after the last person on earth Kay expected – his ex-wife. Post MIB II.
1. Rodentia Impedimenta

**_Title:_**A Universe Not Theirs 

**_Summary:_**The most vicious aliens in the universe are after the last person on earth Kay expected – his ex-wife. Post MIB II. 

**_Author's Notes:_**PG-13 for language. All usual disclaimers apply. Enjoy!

_I_

_Rodentia Impedimenta_

"I cannot _do_ this anymore." 

Agent Kay looked up from his desk work to see his partner, Agent Jay, standing over him holding a stack of yellow papers and looking decidedly annoyed. 

"At _least_ not on a Monday morning," Jay sighed, dropping the papers on the end of Kay's desk. He sat down in an empty chair and stared impatiently at the ceiling. "Man, you and I are highly specialized, highly trained _agents_, what're we doing working on _paperwork? _Aren't there some butts out there we could be savin'?" 

"Sorry kid," Kay said, turning back to his own paperwork. "All quiet on the home front." 

"That's a good thing, I guess," Jay muttered, looking restlessly about the huge office they were in. Seemed everything and everyone was working at a slower pace today. Even the aliens waiting in customs looked like they had all the time in the world. Jay rapped his fingers on the arm of the chair and tapped his foot. He liked action. Being chained to a desk was like purgatory to someone like him who craved to be out in the field, doing something, _anything. _He often thought he could stare any sort of difficulty right in the face and not flinch – but being trapped inside filling out mindless busywork was enough to do him in. He sighed. "Kay, there's got to be _something_ we can do! Something that requires _movement._" 

"Pushing a pen over paper requires movement." 

"You _know_ what I mean." 

"You know, you should really take the time to enjoy these little breaks in our work." 

"I _hate_ paperwork. Reminds me of the NYPD." Kay said nothing and continued to work. Jay looked away, annoyed, his eyes landing on a purple alien going through the customs line. He watched carefully as the alien silently reached into its cloak and began to pull out something metal and diabolical looking…

"FREEZE!" Jay roared, leaping heroically up onto Kay's desk and pulling out his gun. Unfortunately, landing on a stack of papers never proves to be beneficial to one's balance, and Jay, having lost his footing, soon found himself flying through the air, minus his gun, and landing back on Kay's desk, effectively breaking it into two even pieces, sending the computer and a massive amount of paperwork soaring into the air. 

The office was silent a moment. Papers wafted gently in the air, raining down on Kay and the recently horizontal Jay, as the alien in question held up a magnifying glass. "For my kids," he gargled in his own language. 

Jay looked over at Kay. His face was stony. He leaned over, carefully so as to bisect his injured desk, to examine his computer, which now lay in about sixteen separate pieces on the floor. Kay sat up straight and looked back at Jay, who smiled meekly. He sighed and stood up. "C'mon." 

"Where we going?"

"As I am deskless and you are a child, we're gonna go find some alien trouble. Let's go." 

"Now you're talkin'!"

Five minutes later a black Mercedes thundered out onto the streets of Manhattan blasting Sisters Sledge. "Jay, what the _hell_ is this?!" Kay cried over a rapturous chorus of 'We Are Family.'

"It's a classic!" 

"Turn it off, or we'll go back and do paperwork!" 

Silence. "Kay, am I going to be able to use my new invisibility mode for this? Check this out." Jay pressed a button on the side of his watch and disappeared. "Pretty slick, huh?" 

"Impractical for this mission." 

"It'll come in handy someday. So what have we got? Body snatching? Illegal cloning of alien life forms? Stowaway trouble?" Jay asked as he faded back into view.

"Gerbils." 

A pause. "Gerbils." 

"That's right, slick," Kay said as he pulled into an apartment building parking lot. 

Jay frowned. "The MiB was called out…'cause of _gerbils?" _

"Look kid, you're the one who wanted to go out, not me. This stuff is for our minor agents, but no, Mr. Jay was bored, and – "

"All right, all right, all right. So we got gerbils." 

"Yep."  

"What _about_ these gerbils?" Jay asked as they both got out of the car and started for the door. 

"I don't know," Kay said, straightening out his jacket. 

Jay shook his head. "Man, I love it how you always know exactly what's going on," he said sarcastically. "I mean, I feel _really comfortable_ working with a man who's always one step ahead of the game – "

"Don't push your luck, kid." 

A scene seldom seen by any greeted Kay and Jay at the door of the apartment in question. A mighty gerbil, a queen among rodents, towered above all who beheld her – and most of those beholding her were hiding behind the couch and whimpering. Towering wasn't the only thing she was doing, however; bits of froth careened from her mouth as the building shook from her deafening roar, her claws slashing the spring-hued curtains to bits, and her swarthy tail swishing back and forth, as if challenging anyone to go near her. 

"Prunella!" Kay shouted reproachfully once he caught sight of the massive rodent. "I thought I told you to stay out of the pet shops! You know you aren't cleared for domestic living arrangements!" 

"You know this thing?!" Jay screamed, astonished at his partner once again. 

The gerbil roared again, tongue flailing. "Is that so?" Kay said, cocking one ear to hear her better. "Well, when was the last time?" Again, the gerbil snarled thunderously. Jay covered his ears. Kay shook his head. "You have to forgive them, Prunella! I can't be called out here every time your owner forgets to feed you, for crying out loud!" Kay pulled a small device out of his coat, aimed it at Prunella, and fired. Although writhing, she shrunk back down to normal gerbil size and Kay picked her up. She docilely licked his finger. "You have some serious anger management problems, you know that? Now, I'll continue to let you live here if you _promise_ no more flare ups!" Prunella _chee_-ed. "All right, then. Its settled. Six alien anger management classes down at MiB headquarters and if I get one more call to come here you're going straight back where you came from, little miss. Got it?" Kay put on his sunglasses and aimed it at the panic-stricken family. Jay covered his eyes as it flashed. "All right. Your gerbil _did not_  grow to over one hundred times its normal size, and it did not deafen you with its war cry. You will never, ever, ever, ever, ever, _ever_ forget to feed your gerbil _ever_ again. Your curtains were destroyed by a flock of rabid pigeons, and my partner and I are just a figment of your imagination." He turned to Jay. "C'mon kid, let's get out of here." 

"Gladly," Jay muttered, following his partner out the door.

"Well, enough for one day?" Kay asked as they both got back in the car. 

Jay sighed. "I would face a _hundred_ of those damn things before looking forward to _paperwork_…"


	2. Just Another Day at the Office

II

_Just Another Day at the Office_

"Well, its about time you boys showed up," Zed said as soon as Kay and Jay returned from the morning's escapades. Kay couldn't help but notice that the office seemed considerably more frantic than when he had left. 

"Things finally picking up, I see?" 

"No rest for the weary. Kay, I need to speak to you," Zed said, already leading Kay up to his office. Jay followed closely, but Zed waved him away. "Sorry Jay, this is for Kay's ears only. I think there's some paperwork that still needs to be done." Kay tried to ignore the blue remarks coming from under Jay's breath as he climbed the stairs to Zed's office. A curious looking aircraft pictured on the television screen was frozen in motion. Zed pointed to it. "Ever seen one of those?" 

Kay scrutinized it for a moment. "Looks like a Class-C Salta craft. With variations." 

"Right you are. And you know what clever tricksters the Dlrow are." Zed hit a few buttons and the picture of the Salta craft disappeared. It was replaced by a four line stanza reading, 

Try as you might, try with your best We know the way to get under your vest. 

_Who will it be? Who will you fight? _

_How will you hide her, facing your fright? _

"A threatening riddle. A poor one at that. Its not even in haiku form." 

"Kay, try to be serious here. You know the Dlrow aren't the smartest carbon-based life forms in the universe, and their English is atrocious. But you _do_ know how dangerous they are." 

Kay nodded silently, his mind drifting back to a night about ten years ago, the last time the Dlrow showed up on earth. It was a blood bath to say the least. The Dlrow were the worst kind of alien – those who killed for the fun of it, without remorse, without even thinking. Often times he had wondered how such a violent society of aliens could have even survived long enough to rein down with violence on other planets; but they reproduced quickly and often, thereby replenishing their need of warriors and murderers continuously. They had taken out twelve MiB agents without so much as flinching as they paraded through Central Park that night. Kay had managed an ambush that resulted in the loss of the Dlrow leader, thereby ending the siege. However, even then he wasn't naïve enough to believe he had seen the last of the Dlrow. 

"There _is_ some good news," Zed said, handing him a report. "Seems the Dlrow are a dying breed. Thousands of generations of continuous warfare seems to be taking its toll on them. Not only that, but their home planet of Noisicerp was destroyed last winter in that unfortunate hyper-laser beam incident." 

"I told Marty to keep away from those controls, but he didn't listen to me." Kay flipped through the report half-heartedly. "So if they're a dying race, why are they coming here?" 

"On the market for a new planet, of course," Zed said carefully, leaning back in his seat. "They've had plenty of run-ins with us, and know that if they bring the MiB down they stand a better chance of taking over the world for their breeding needs." Zed looked away thoughtfully. "We've fought for a lot of things, Kay, but I think fighting to save the earth from a gigantic alien orgy is a new one, even for me." 

"So what's this got to do with me?" Kay asked, dropping the report back down on Zed's desk. "What's so important about this message that my own partner can't see it?" 

"Isn't it obvious, Kay?" Zed asked, amazed. "That alien poetry is for you!" 

_"Me?" _

"_'Try as you might, try with your best.' _ Our best. That's you. Our best agent." 

"I'm flattered." 

"_'We know the way to get under your vest.'_  They know something, or someone, and are planning on using it against you. They know the way to get under your skin about something, to strike you where you least expect it." 

"I see." 

"_'Who will it be? Who will you fight? How will you hide her, facing your fright?'_" Zed sighed. "I can't help you with this part, Kay. It's a meaning you have to work out for yourself." 

Kay scratched his chin and paced the office. "The way to get under my skin…it's a person…it's a her…and a fear…what _is_ it? What are they _talking_ about?" 

"I don't know," said Zed as he stood up from his chair to leave. "But you'd better figure it out quick, because chances are there's an innocent person out there who's going to get a real shock when blue-tentacled, over-grown amoebas show up at their door." Zed paused in the doorway and said quietly, "I wish I could help you with this one Kay, but it's a mission of a personal order. Only you can crack the code, and only you hold the key to the earth's survival." He patted Kay on the shoulder, an unusual gesture of affection between the two men. "Good luck," he whispered. "I believe in you." 

Kay watched Zed descend the steps, his mind already turning back to the riddle at hand. He slid his hand unconsciously into his right pocket and began to rub a small metal key chain as he always did when he was troubled. Sighing, Kay pulled the metal ring out of his pocket and looked at it. Usually, he didn't even allow himself to look at the battered, worn steel disk with a faded cartoon dog on it; it brought back too many painful memories. This had been the key ring his wife had given him after she won it at the fair in Brumsbruck, and the last keys it had held were the keys to he and his wife's house in Massachusetts. It had only been three years since his abrupt departure from the simple life of a New England postal worker, but he missed it continuously, until it was just a dull ache in the bottom of his heart. He smiled as his eyes roamed over the small item, his only remnant from that time in his life. God, he missed her sometimes. He missed her the most when he'd wake up suddenly in the middle of the night, the times when he used to comfort himself by wrapping his arms around her and breathing in the smell of her lotion. She could always make him feel safe, something that he hadn't truly felt in the pit of his stomach for years. He sighed and shoved the key chain back in his pocket; there was no time for sentimental memories now, he had a riddle to solve and a planet to save.

Eyes straining, he tried his best to turn his attention back to the puzzle on the television screen. "'We know the way to get under your vest…who will it be…_who _will it be…try your best…how will you hide her, facing your – oh no." His blood ran cold. 

"Elizabeth." 


	3. The Love of My Life

III

_The Love of My Life_

The neighborhood still looked the same as it always had; Kay felt like he'd only been away for a few hours as he winded his way up through town, past the library, above the hill overlooking Dill's Bait Shop and Gardener's Hobby Lounge, onto the street that led up to where he had spent the better part of four years with a woman whom he'd given up thirty five year's memory for. The patched pavement covered in a thin layer of sand brought back memories he'd tried hard to forget in the lonely hours of twilight for the past three years. He'd walked home from work this way every day, smelling the thick ocean air, enjoying the way the wind ruffled through his hair, and anticipating an evening with the only woman he could ever truly feel at home with. 

Of course, those had been simpler days, he thought to himself. Memories could be a burdensome thing, especially _his_ memories. As he fingered the steering wheel while trying to avoid looking at the lighthouse which held the memory of his first kiss with lovely Elizabeth, he again wondered what exactly was going to happen once he and she were face to face once again. 

But things had changed since the last time they were face to face, that was for sure. He wondered if he would even be the same man to her or if she would perceive the difference. He snorted at this thought. Elizabeth was no fool. She would want the full story, and he would certainly give it to her. She deserved that much. Besides, whatever she said to him couldn't hurt him any more than what she had already said during the divorce. 

Another painful memory, he thought as he pulled to the side of the road to contemplate his entry strategy. After all, he couldn't just barge in after disappearing for four years from her life. "Three years," he corrected himself under his breath, remembering the final year after the separation before Jay's return. As the postmaster general of a small Massachusetts sea town, it was damn near impossible to avoid anyone, let alone your ex-wife. "Not ex-wife yet, divorce isn't final yet…" he again stammered to himself, running his fingers nervously over his lips. It hadn't been an altogether pleasant separation, but on the whole Kay couldn't blame her. "Hell, I would have divorced me too!" he cried out loud, smacking the dashboard for effect. Slow down, buddy. Take a deep breath. In. Out. He exhaled abruptly. This may be harder than originally planned.  

Kay took another deep breath and eased the car into a steady ascent of the final hill before reaching Elizabeth's house – their house. His eyes glazed as it loomed on the horizon, seeming to taunt him with memories of warm summer days, laying in the hammock, dancing on the back porch, and everything that had made those four short years the best of his life. The car slowed to a stop and Kay adjusted his tie in the mirror and smoothed back his hair. It was show time. 

The front porch was a different color, he noticed as he climbed the sturdy wooden steps up to the door. The front door was open, with only a screen door to protect against mosquitoes and no-see-ums, which were thick this time of the year. He rapped the door frame briskly, and smoothed out his suit self-consciously. He heard footsteps somewhere within the house. Bare feet on wood floors. God, he missed those summer days. 

The lady with the beautiful black hair who inhabited his memory stopped dead at the entry hallway once she caught sight of him. _No,_ she thought to herself. _It couldn't be…_

"Elizabeth, I need to talk to you, dear," Kay said as ambiguously as he could, arms folded in front of him. 

"What are you doing here?" she demanded, not moving an inch. "You've got a lot of nerve, Kevin, coming back here like this – "

"Look, we don't have a lot of time," Kay said impatiently. "Can I come in?" 

"Where have you been?" Elizabeth said, not missing a beat. "Three years ago you just walk out on your job, no one knows where you went. I was – "

"Worried sick?" 

"No. Mad as hell. Kevin, when are you going to get around to signing those divorce papers, hm?" 

"All in good time, darling, now come with me," he said, entering and taking Elizabeth by the arm. She tore away from him. "Now look, we can do this the easy way or the hard way. You're in danger, and we've got to get you out of here." 

"The only thing I'm in danger of is breaking your nose, buster. Who do you think you are, anyway?" 

"Agent Kay, INS Division Six." Elizabeth shot him a bewildered expression. Kay smiled. "Come on Lizzy, I'll explain in the car." 

"You're crazy," Elizabeth said, backing away towards the phone. "I'm calling the cops – "

"Won't do any good," Kay said reasonably, straitening his cufflinks. "Elizabeth, I'm not here to hurt you. You know me well enough to know I wouldn't do that."

"No, I don't. I don't know you at all. That's why we got divorced, dearest, don't you remember?" she said in a cynical voice as she picked up the phone. A stormy look surfaced on Kay's face that stopped Elizabeth dead in her tracks, and she didn't fight back as he placed the phone back on the receiver. Kay looked at her seriously for a moment before saying in dark voice, 

"I told you that I won't hurt you, and I mean it. I told you I'd explain everything to you, and I mean it. But I need you to come with me _right now_. You're in trouble, and we're running out of time. Understand?" 

Elizabeth was silent for a moment, studying his face carefully. She took a deep breath and said softly in a razor sharp voice, "You disappear for three years. No one knows where you are. No one knows how to contact you. Then you showed up in my home two minutes ago, and you expect me to come with you."  

"Elizabeth, this isn't about you and I. This is about something much bigger, and we just happen to be a part of it, that's all. Will you come with me peacefully?"

She smiled. "Not on your life, bud." 

A quick hook to the right left Kay's nose considerably bloodier than before as Elizabeth tore out the back door. Kay flew out after her and tackled her to the ground. She struggled beneath him but was no match for his weight. "Always was better at pinning you, even when we were kids, right dear?" he said as he took a needle out of his jacket pocket. She began to scream at the top of her lungs. Kay cupped his hand over her mouth and sighed painfully. He hated this. The needle plunged in near the base of her neck and started working almost immediately. Elizabeth started to go limp as her vision clouded and became black, but she continued to struggle for as long as her consciousness would let her. Finally, the drugs won out and Kay stood over her, breathing heavily and looking around to see if anyone had seen them. When he was satisfied that they were alone, he hoisted her up over his shoulder and carried her back to the car, laying her down gently in the backseat. 

Kay looked in the mirror to find his nose bloody and swollen. He dabbed at it daintily with a Kleenex, but it was too painful to do much more than that. He happened a glance back up at the house and an overwhelming sense of sadness suddenly came over him. Is this how it ended? A house once full of such life and love was now the scene of a forceful kidnapping, of all things? And not just a forceful kidnapping: a forceful kidnapping by a man who used to love and cherish everything that went on in this house? A forceful kidnapping where one lover kidnapped the other? Kay felt hot tears stinging at his eyes for the first time in years but wiped them away; he would not let heartbroken tears fall on the suit that dictated emotional stoicism. He cursed himself for getting affected by this situation; he had done hundreds of kidnappings just like this one. In fact, he thought, as kidnappings go, this was one of the milder ones. Why was this one so different? A quick glimpse to the lady laying unconscious in the backseat answered his question. "Because its Elizabeth." He sighed. 

"Because it's the goddamn love of my life." 


	4. A Sight to See

IV

_A Sight to See_

"Jay?" 

"Kay! Hey, where are you, man? I tried to find you at lunchtime to see if you wanted to go get some burritos down at the Speedy Feedy, and no one knew where you were! How come you didn't tell me you were leaving?" 

"Had to run an errand, kid. Look, I need you to prepare and unlock one of our holding rooms. I'm bringing someone in who's going to need accommodation for a few days." 

"One of _those_ errands. Gotcha." 

"Make it one of the big rooms, with a living room and wet bar and all of that." 

"Right." 

"And make sure the pillows are fluffy and the candy dish is full and the cable television has been turned on." 

"Man, who you bringing in? Royalty?" 

Kay opened his mouth to answer, but the car suddenly jolted to the right, as if being hit by something. He swerved just in time to avoid hitting a parked ice cream truck, but was struck again by some unknown force with a very bright light. "I'm going to have to call you back," Kay said calmly, dodging a stray dog and heading down an alley way. "I think I got company." 

"All right. Take it easy." 

"Will do," he said brightly as another flash of light narrowly missed the car and destroyed the brick wall to his left. Kay toyed with the notion of sending the car into hyperspeed, but decided against it as they were only a few blocks away from headquarters. He had wondered when the Dlrow would catch up to them. Knowing that he had probably gotten Elizabeth out of Massachusetts just in the nick of time, he'd prepared himself to fight on the journey back. He knew she'd be safe in MiB headquarters, and had every intention of fighting the Dlrow off long enough to get her there. 

The jet black Mercedes flew out of the dank alleyway onto 38th street, roaring towards headquarters as fast as Kay would let himself go with such precious cargo in the backseat. The Dlrow Salta craft kept up easily, firing at odd intervals. However, seasoned agent that he was, Kay wasn't expecting that direct hit to the car. Especially a direct hit through the windshield. 

Everything went white for a moment. Kay felt another sharp jolt to the car, this time from another car, and felt a jagged something-or-other slice into his skin in several places. The airbag deployed, blinding him and adding to his general sense of delirium. However, no minor car accident was going to keep Agent Kay from fulfilling his duty – he floored it and hoped for the best. His vision returned a few seconds later, and he sped towards the clandestine back entrance to the MiB. What looked like a solid wall to most inevitably admitted the now defunct automobile into the clutches of the MiB underground garage. The Dlrow spacecraft, following Kay's example, attempted to enter the same way – only to learn that some solid walls are _exactly_ what they appear. 

Kay took a quiet breath. They were safe. She was safe. 

"I saw the whole thing!" Jay shouted as he ran towards the mangled car, followed by a dozen MiB doctors and mechanics, all intent on fixing a broken body. "Here you go," Jay said as he leaned in the [broken] car window, handing Kay a handkerchief. 

"What?" Kay panted in a dazed voice, staring quizzically at the handkerchief. 

"Man, you really did a number on yourself," Jay said quietly as he began to mop up some of the blood on his partner's face. He had seen Kay hurt before, but never confused like this. It was strange. And unnerving. "I think you're going to need some stitches." 

"We need to get her out of here," Kay said in a weak voice, gesturing faintly to the backseat. Jay looked to the back to see a raven-haired lady who was most definitely unconscious. He nodded. 

"All right. I'll take her to the holding room." 

"I want to go with you." 

"Kay, seriously man, you need to get with these doctors here. You're bleeding all over the place – " 

"Don't argue, junior, I didn't come all this way for nothing." Sighing, Jay knew it was just better – and easier – to let him do what he wanted. Kay stood up unsteadily from the car, holding onto the roof for support. 

"I think I should at _least _carry the girl. You don't look like you can carry yourself, let alone someone else." 

"You're right," Kay said, knowing full well that although he didn't come all this way not to see Elizabeth safely to her room, he certainly didn't come all this way to drop her, either. Jay scooped up Elizabeth in his arms and he and Kay set off towards the holding rooms on the third floor below ground. 

Usually used for prisoners, some of the rooms were used when aliens just passing through were at a loss for accommodation. Prisoners cells were, of course, just cells – but the "holding rooms" were actually like a suite in a hotel. A suite with stainless steel walls and no windows. 

Jay walked slowly, not wanting to call attention to the fact that Kay was having a hard time keeping up. They got many inquisitive glances – an agent carrying an unconscious human walking next to an agent covered in blood and straggling along as best he could was an uncommon sight in the MiB hallways. 

"She's pretty," Jay said, breaking the silence while gazing down at the lady's face. "Who is she?" 

Kay looked away. "My ex-wife." 

"Your _what?" _

"The Dlrow are after her, this was the only safe place." 

"Why are they after her?"

"To get to me. I just got to her before they did, that's all." 

"Was that them chasing you?" 

"Yup. Surprised I got as far as I did." 

"It was a good thing they didn't find you before they did. You had a hard enough time beating them off for just a few blocks." A dark look from Kay let Jay know he'd said the wrong thing. "Hey, look, I didn't mean – "

"I know what you meant, slick. Here it is." Holding room I-5B stood ready and waiting to receive its visitor. 

"Kay, I didn't – "

"You said it yourself, son, I need some medical help, so put Elizabeth down and I'll be on my way."

Jay put Elizabeth down on the bed gently then turned to his partner. "Man, what is _with_  you lately?"

"What do you mean?" Kay asked in a flat voice, covering Elizabeth in a blanket. 

"This _attitude_. Jumpin' down my throat all the time." Jay sighed. "Never mind. This is neither the time nor the place. Go on, go get some stitches," he said quietly, swiftly making his exit. 

Kay stared after him for a moment, then turned his attention back to Elizabeth. He put some pillows underneath her head, took off her shoes, and turned out the lights. He ran right into a young doctor standing in the doorway. 

"Sir…ah, your head is bleeding," he stuttered, having never stood near anyone half as important to MiB as Kay was. Kay looked at him for a moment. 

"Well sir I thank you for that. I was wondering what all this pesky red stuff running down my face was. Are you gonna sew me up, or what?" he said snappishly. He closed his eyes. "Sorry. Bad day, you know what I mean? Come on. You can walk me to the hospital wing." 


	5. Unfamiliar Territory

V

_Unfamiliar Territory_

Consciousness was fleeting. It came in fits and starts. Sometimes it was light, sometimes it was dark. Sometimes there were noises and other times there was silence. What lingered was the aching soreness of her neck, sometimes throbbing if she moved too quickly. Finally, after what seemed an eternity of lucid consciousness, she decided it was time to wake up and see what the hell was going on. 

Carefully, she moved her hand underneath herself and began to push with all her might. It was no use. She quickly sank back down on the bed, too weak to even lift herself for a few seconds. Winded, she took short breaths, ones that didn't make too many demands on the pounding ache in her neck. She felt someone's hands tenderly turning her over on her back and then gently applying a cool washcloth to her forehead. Too exhausted to care who it was, she slowly began to fall back into her dreams. 

No, no, no, _no, no, no_. She hadn't made the extraordinary effort to regain consciousness just to lose it again. She clenched her fists as tightly as one in her condition could and gritted her teeth. Ok. Think of things that require conscious thinking. Think of the care it takes to plant a new seed, one that you've never planted before, one that you _really_ want to grow, just so you can look at it once it blooms. Right. First prime the soil.  Make sure the soil is _new_ soil, not leftovers from harvest. It has to be crumbly, and slightly damp. A compact dirt makes for a dead plant, as Mom always used to say… Now, put the seed about one inch deep in the soil. Are you imagining it? Good. Now water it. Feel that water hose in your fingers, the one that always leaks and gets all over your pants. Good. That's good. I think we're ready to open our eyes now. 

Elizabeth slowly opened her eyes. A fuzzy world came into view. Blinking, she found her vision improved as the seconds passed. She turned her head to the right and was as surprised to see Kay as he was to see her awake. 

"Kevin – " 

"Shhh, don't talk," he said softly, again dabbing her forehead with a cool washcloth. She caught sight of the bandage on his forehead and instinctively reached out to touch it. He pulled away, smiling apologetically. 

"What happened?" she croaked, just barely above a whisper. Her brow was furled in that look of concern which was so familiar to Kay. He looked at her for a moment, studying her features. He sighed. 

"Just a bump on the head. We ran into…some car trouble on the way here." 

"Where am I?" she whispered weakly. "What am I doing here?" 

Kay continued to gaze at her for a moment before saying, "You're tired. Rest now. We'll talk later. I promise." 

Not having the energy to argue, Elizabeth swiftly returned to unconsciousness. It was not until she awoke abruptly from a dream several hours later did she truly realize something was awry. At first she thought the whole ordeal had just been a dream, but as her reasoning skills returned to her, she found herself in very unfamiliar territory indeed. It was a fairly large room with a bathroom connected to it. Furniture was sparse and functional, and she was amazed to see that the walls seemed to be made of seamless steel. 

Jay had walked Kay down to the holding room, talking with him eagerly about the current Dlrow invasion. "We don't know where they are, when they're going to strike…" 

"Just be patient. We'll figure it out." 

"'Be patient'? What do you mean, _be patient? _The Dlrow are like the Rambos of the universe, Kay. We gotta have a _plan…_" 

"Kevin!" Elizabeth shouted from the inside of the room, though she wasn't sure anyone could hear her. "Kevin, where are you?!" 

"Hey, whoa, you mean she _remembers  _you?" Jay asked, arching an eyebrow as he and Kay stood outside her door, poised to enter. 

Elizabeth hit the wall inside her cell. _"Bastard!" _she roared. 

"Yup," Kay said without a trace of emotion. "She remembers me." 

"But I thought MiB neurilizes all friend and family members…even _former_ family members…" 

"They do," Kay said simply. "But you see there's still a few papers I need to sign…"

"For security reasons?" 

"No, for marital reasons." 

"Marital?" 

"Look, kid, it isn't pertinent at this time, therefore I don't want to talk about it." 

"But – "

"I _don't_ want to talk about it," Kay repeated sharply.

"Hey, that's fine man, I just wanted to see if there was anything I could do – "

"Well there isn't." He straightened his tie. "Now look, I have some explaining to do, and I need to do it alone." 

Jay held up his hands in defeat. "Point taken, big guy. You want a coffee or something?" 

"No, but I'd like it if you could see about getting me a new desk. And _don't_ let them give me one of those lime green ones left over from the late 60's. I don't know _what_  we were thinking…" Kay sighed as he watched his partner head down the hall. He turned his attention back to the door. It was now or never. 

Seeing Kay standing in the doorway, Elizabeth tried to sit up to quickly and was punished with the Throbbing Neck from Hell. She sank back down, breathing heavily. 

"Dammit Kevin, what did you _give _me?" she demanded in a hoarse tone. 

"Looking back on it, I think I was being overly cautious, and I might have given you a smidge too much," Kay said, taking a chair from the corner and sitting backwards in it. "I'm sorry. I'm not used to sedating humans." 

Elizabeth, determined to sit upright, rose slowly from the bed until she could lean against the wall. "Ok," she said. "Start talking." 

Kay took a deep breath and looked at her deep in the eyes. "Elizabeth, there was no coma." 

"No coma? So where were you for thirty five years?" 

"I was here. I work for a covert operational facility that monitors and controls all extraterrestrial life forms on Earth. First let me explain that no, I'm not crazy, and no, you did not misunderstand me. There are aliens. On Earth. My job is to help keep them out of trouble, and to keep them from being discovered by your everyday, run of the mill human." 

"What?" Elizabeth gasped, convinced she was still in a dream. 

"Do you remember the night I disappeared all those years ago?" 

"You mean the night of your car accident? Sure. We all thought you had died, drowned in the river, the body never recovered. It was the worst night of my life. But I told you all this when you came back." 

"Right. There was no car accident. That's the night I decided I wanted to devote my life to this cause – my cause – and become a part of the Men in Black." 

"The what?" 

"Don't worry about it, you'll catch up as we go along. So, no car accident, no coma – it was all a cover up. I had to come up with something." 

"So why did you come back eight years ago? Why did you come back home, only to leave again?" 

"I was ready to retire. I was ready for a normal life." He sighed. "And, I was ready to settle down with a certain childhood sweetheart of mine." 

"Well, things don't always turn out as planned, do they puddin'?"

"No, darlin', they sure don't." 

"So let me get this straight. Throughout our whole marriage, you knew? You lied?" 

"No, I'm not a liar. They erased all memory I had of ever working for this organization before I came home to you. So, during our short four year interlude, I had no idea of who I was or what I'd been. And, if I had, I wouldn't have been able to be with you. The MiB has strict rules about that sort of thing. Agents come and go…its better if there's no one out there in the world who cares about them. A rationalization for expenditure, you could say." He looked away. "Erasing my memory…forgetting who I was…it was the only way to be able to be with you. I was willing to sacrifice that." 

Elizabeth bit her lip. "So you…left here, because you wanted to be with me? You gave up all knowledge that you had of yourself…for me?" 

"Honey, a twenty year old kid doesn't shit about himself, and that's where I was starting the day I showed up on your doorstep. Thus, my little 'self-identity' problems that eventually tore us apart." 

Tears began to well up in Elizabeth's eyes. "Kevin…" 

"Look, let's not get all emotional right now. We're in serious trouble, and we don't have much time to get out of it. I know you probably don't believe everything I've said tonight, but hopefully I can prove it to you in the days to come. Until then, you're just going to have to trust me." He looked at her carefully. "Can you trust me?" 

Elizabeth took his hand in hers. "Yes. I can do that." 

"Good. Now look, we got some _nasty_ little buggers after us called the Dlrow. They're a fiercesome, warring alien tribe who's population is on the wane, and for whatever reason, they've decided that Earth is the perfect little place to raise a family. Problem is, their families run into the millions, and the only honorable way to die is in the heat of battle." 

"Sort of like the Celts of the universe?" 

"You could say that. They know that if they bring MiB down, they can take the world by surprise and easily gain dominion over the Earth. However, they wanted to get more specific than just targeting the MiB; they're targeting me."

"You?"

"Yes. They sent me a riddle, in essence threatening to take away someone who was more important to me than anyone else in the world and using it to lure me, and ultimately kill me. That's why I came back, Elizabeth. That's why I had to come get you." 

"But we got away! I mean, I'm safe, you're safe…" 

"We had a close call today in the car, though," Kay said, gesturing to his head wound. "We got out of there just in the nick of time. Yes, you're safe, for the time being. And rest assured I'm going to do everything in my power to keep them away from you." 

"Oh God; _you're _not an alien, are you Kevin?" 

"No, but that would certainly be a good story line," Kay said, arching an eyebrow at all fan fiction writers.

Elizabeth shuddered; she felt like she was in a horror movie. "This is all so unbelievable…" 

"You need some time to let this all sink in," Kay said, rising from the chair. He fingered the back of the chair nervously. "Look, um…why don't I come back tonight to see how you're doing? You can meet my partner. We can have some coffee or something. We have good coffee." 

Despite the situation, Elizabeth found herself smiling. He sounded as nervous now as the first time he had asked her on a date. "Sure, why not? I guess I could use the company." 

Kay smiled broadly. "Great. That's wonderful," he said in a voice much lighter than normal. "I'll – I mean, we'll – see you then." 


	6. What's Love Got To Do With It?

VI

_What's Love Got to do with It? _

"Thai food. Hope that's ok with you." 

Jay dropped the bag of food down on Kay's new desk and began to dig in. "I am _starved…" _he muttered, picking up one of the boxes and tearing into it. 

"Isn't there a break room somewhere you could be eating that?" Kay said, not looking up from his work. 

"We're working, right? It's a working dinner. C'mon Kay, while its hot." 

Kay half-heartedly swallowed a few bites before turning his full attention back to the Dlrow file in front of him. Jay scowled. "You know I didn't say anything when you went back on duty today about an hour after you got ripped to pieces by a windshield, but you gotta at _least _eat dinner, man! We're gonna be fightin' off the _Dlrow _– you need your energy!" 

More to appease his partner than out of actual hunger, Kay put down the Dlrow file and began to eat. "Waste of time anyway," he said. "I already know all there is to know about the Dlrow – and knowing that, I know there's nothing to be done until they make the first move." 

"Hey, you know maybe they'll just call off this whole invasion of Earth thing. I mean, you got your girl, we got one of their spacecraft – "

"The Dlrow don't give up that easily, slick. If anything, failure just makes them angrier." Kay poked at his food. "My only consolation is that Elizabeth is safe. As safe as she can be for now." 

Jay didn't say anything but knew there was probably more to this story than Kay was letting on. The worn lines on his partner's face spoke of sadness in the past, and they were more pronounced now than ever. He understood; hell, loneliness was part of the job description of an MiB agent. He knew what it was to dream about people who had once loved you but now had no recollection of it whatsoever. Silently, he was grateful that his mother had died long before he joined MiB; the prospect of your own mother not knowing your face was probably one of the most painful things a human being could experience. However, he knew there were still a lot of things he didn't understand as well as Kay did – especially things like marriage and divorce. 

"C'mon." 

"Where we going now?" 

"I told Elizabeth we'd go and check up on her tonight." 

Jay smiled as they both stood up to leave. "You know, I think there's still something there between you and your lady – "

"Jay, are you coming or not?" 

"Right behind you, chief. Let's go. 

Elizabeth stood at the bathroom mirror, dabbing the last bits of water off her forehead after washing her face. She was beginning to feel human again. The drugs having finally worn off, she had had a little time to look around the room and think about things. The place wasn't half bad. It was warm and clean, its only crime being that it was, after all, sort of a cell. She had shaken this off, consoling herself with the thought that Kevin wouldn't ever put her in danger, no matter whether he was a mysterious secret agent or a mail man. His story, oddly enough, seemed to be sinking in pretty well with her. It made sense in a strange sort of way. It would explain Kevin's constant fascination with the cosmos and his distant nature. 

Life had been good for them as teenagers, though they were complete opposites. Kevin had been a sci-fi fanatic, a hobby Elizabeth could never understand nor explain. He was good-natured though, and endearing in his own semi-geeky way. For dates he had always taken her to see the newest science fiction film, something she went along with as best her patience would let her, only because he seemed to enjoy it so damn much. She enjoyed art and botany, something he could only enjoy in a passing nature, but they had gotten along perfectly. They could always make each other laugh.

Living in a small town like they did, news of Kevin's car accident and apparent death had spread rapidly. Elizabeth had felt like the whole world had been pulled from underneath her. She remembered vividly watching as the crane pulled Kevin's mangled old pick up truck out of the water, depositing it gently on the sand, minus its driver. The river was dredged but turned up nothing. No one was surprised. It had been a particularly rainy season and the current was fast. Little hope remained of ever retrieving the body. The police had discovered disrupted dirt near the scene of the accident and had ruled out suicide as a possible cause. However, even before that Elizabeth knew suicide hadn't been the cause. Perhaps she would never know the cause. It didn't matter too much anyway; Kevin was gone, and she was alone. 

She had cried so hard it hurt. Her parents had tried to console her with comforting sayings like, "He's in a better place," "He would want you to be happy," and all the things people say to you when they don't know what else to say. In time, the emotional wounds healed as well as they ever could and she had gone on to college and graduate school, eventually opening her own nursery in the small town she and Kevin had grown up in. Though the rest of the town believed she had never gotten married because she had never gotten over Kevin's death, this was untrue; she had almost gotten married a couple of times. They never came to fruition, mostly because she felt her life was already as fulfilled as it ever could be, what with her nursery and her artwork, and had opted to stay a bachelorette. She occasionally went out on dates but never let the relationship progress very far. Her life was just fine without a man, thank you very much. 

Of course, this had been before Kevin showed up on her doorstep one bright September morning. The story of a thirty-five year long coma was a bit far-fetched even to her mind, which had been fanaticizing something like this since the night of Kevin's death. She again found that she didn't care about the cause. Kevin was back, and that was all that mattered. 

Some called it a whirlwind romance, which looking back on it, she supposed it was. It was like they had never been apart; they picked up right where they had left off, thirty-five years earlier.  She had taken him to all their old childhood haunts to show them how they had changed or how they hadn't. They went to plays and museums and on vacations together, but even then she could tell that there was more to Kevin than met the eye. 

This became more and more apparent as their marriage progressed. She would come home from work at night to find Kevin sitting on the front porch, staring into space, having been there for hours. When she'd called his name, he'd looked at her like he was a million miles away. Sometimes she would ask him what he had been thinking about, to which he would always reply in a confused tone, "I don't know." 

Sometimes he would do strange things, or talk in a strange way that no one, save a police officer, would speak. She began to get more and more worried when his little "space-out" sessions began to extend on into evening. At times, they would be watching the nightly news and she would glance over to him only to find him staring blindly at the curtains. She would gently remind him that it was the TV he should be staring at, but it unnerved her. Elizabeth tried her best to be patient with him; after all, he'd been out cold for thirty five years. He seemed to be so clueless about so many things. And he drove like a maniac. 

Eventually, things started to become undone. Arguments became more frequent. So did long evenings spent at the nursery, checking and re-checking things simply so she didn't have to go home. Talking became exhausting and futile with Kevin. Evenings out weren't fun anymore. Even living together became a chore. Elizabeth pleaded with Kevin to seek out some professional help, someone who could help him cope with losing that many years of his life. He refused. Cutting, hurtful words were hurled at each other, angry tears shed. Neither one wanted to see their marriage fall apart but that's exactly what it was doing, and it was getting worse every day. She loved him more than anyone else on earth, but Kevin's frustrations became more than she could bear and she filed for divorce shortly after their fourth wedding anniversary. 

Everyone in the town was shocked. Kevin looked devastated when she handed him the papers, more hurt than she had even seen on a human being. Deep in her gut, though, Elizabeth knew she was doing the right thing. This is how it had to be. 

That is, until he had showed up today. Suddenly he didn't seem like the distant, confusing man she'd left behind in the divorce; he was, in essence, everything that she'd imagined a middle-aged Kevin should be: confident, smart, and on top of things. 

Elizabeth was interrupted from her thoughts by a quick knock on her door. "Come in!" she called as she smoothed out her blouse. Kay entered with a smile to greet her, with Jay right behind him. 

"Mrs. Reston, nice to meet you finally! I'm Jay," he said warmly, shaking her hand. 

"Hi Jay, you can call me Elizabeth. Come on in, sit down." 

"We brought you some food," Kay said, handing her their leftover Thai as they all sat down. 

"Oh thanks! I'm famished," Elizabeth said, tearing into the food. "They sent down a meal a little while ago, but it didn't look edible." 

"Probably wasn't. Not for humans, anyway. So how're you feeling? Any better?" 

Jay stared at his partner in amazement. He was _smiling. Broadly. _And he actually sounded…_happy_. 

"Yeah, I feel fine now. How about you? How's your head?" Elizabeth reached out and touched Kay's forehead; this time he let her. He'd forgotten how soft her touch was. 

"Fine, its fine," he said, not taking his eyes off her and grinning stupidly. "Just fine." 

Kay and Elizabeth looked like they could continue staring at one another for another millennia, so Jay cleared his throat loudly. "Excuse us, Elizabeth, but we need to get going." He grinned. "Lotta work to do. Savin' the world and all." He made his way towards the door, only to see that Kay wasn't following. "You comin'?" 

"You go on. I'll see you later, slick." 

Jay looked at Kay strangely. "Can I talk to you out in the hallway for a second?" Kay followed Jay out into the hallway, shutting the door behind them. Jay put his hands on his hips. "Man, what are you doing?" 

"What? What are you talking about?" 

"You know damn well what I'm talking about. Does your face hurt?" 

"Why?" 

"Because I've never seen you smile that much. Look, you're the one who's always going on about not getting emotionally involved, and as your partner I gotta tell you, you _gettin' _emotionally involved." 

"Look son, I was checking up on her to see if she was all right. She's had a trying day." 

"Bullshit. I know what those looks you're giving her mean, I'm not stupid. When a man looks at a women like that, the _last_ thing that look means is, 'Gee are you all right after almost being kidnapped by an alien?'." 

"You don't know the first thing – "

"The hell I don't. You're not the only one to have lost someone you love, you know that. I know _exactly_ what it feels like. But I also know that there's too much risk here." He sighed. "Look, I'm only telling you this because I don't want to see you get hurt. I know you missed your girl while you were away from her. Anyone would. And I know how hard it must be to be next to her and _not_ feel and talk and look at her in that way." 

"That's where you're wrong," Kay said darkly, looking Jay directly in the eye. "You have no idea how hard it is." 

Jay looked away, defeated. "I just…don't want to see you doing something now that you'll regret later, that's all." 

Kay stared bullets at Jay for a moment, not speaking a word. Jay fumbled with his coat buttons, not wanting to look his partner in the eye. Kay whispered in a fierce tone, "Earlier today you wanted to know 'what was with my attitude.' This is why. Its because you make smartass comments when you don't know the first thing about what you're talking about. You've been in this game eight years, and I would have thought you'd grown up by now." 

This did it. Jay looked up with a fiery gaze. "Kay, I'm telling you this as your _friend_." 

"You're not my friend, junior. Never have been, never will be." 

The words stung deeply but Jay fought to keep his cool. "Fine," he said crisply. "I guess this is where we part company, huh? From now on we work together, period. Partners. Only because we have to be." 

"Sounds good to me." 

Without a second glace, Jay strode with a furious pace as fast as his legs could carry him away from the holding wing. Kay watched him go, then slid back inside the door, trying hard to ignore the memory of Jay's hurt face. "What's the matter?" Elizabeth asked from the couch where she was finishing up her dinner. 

"Nothing," he whispered, shoving his hands in his pockets. "Just a bit of business." 

"Come sit with me," she said, patting a spot next to her. He did. "Now tell me. What's the matter?" 

"My partner. He just…he means well, but well…" 

"Well what?" 

"I don't know. I probably shouldn't have said what I just said." He sighed. "I'm just sort of…worried about this case, you know what I mean?" 

"Do all your cases get you this worked up?" 

"No." 

"Why not?" 

"Because…well…" He looked up at her. "Because this one centers around you. I have a lot more to lose this time." Kay turned his gaze towards the floor. "You wanna know something I've never told anyone before?" he asked softly. 

"Yeah, I do," Elizabeth answered, placing a hand on his arm. 

"When I…when I'm working on a case, and it involves some sort of alien species taking over the Earth or destroying it, I found a long time ago that doing it just for that reason wasn't enough." 

"What do you mean?" 

"When you live in the city, and you're all alone, and no one knows you and no one cares…you get to wondering if maybe it's even worth it to save the Earth. You see all the bad things in life. You see all the low-lives, all the crime, all the greed…and you get to wondering why you care so much. You start to wonder what you're even fighting for. What are you risking your life for? A bunch of criminals? Thieves? Greedy, selfish humans who don't give a damn whether you live or die? No, that doesn't give you much to fight for. But I figured out a way to care." 

"How's that?" 

"I think about you. I think about you, and your family, and your town, and how if I don't stop this invasion, it might very well mean the death of you and everyone you care about. When I'm fighting, I'm thinking, 'I'm doing this for Elizabeth. I can't let her down.' Then, and only then, can I fight." 

Elizabeth smiled and wondered how many billions of lives had been saved simply because the man sitting there cared about her. She kissed him gently on the cheek. "Thank you," she whispered. "That may be the best compliment anyone has ever gotten." 

Kay smiled and touched her cheek. "God, I missed you Liz," he murmured. 

"I missed you too," she whispered. 

Kay leaned over and kissed her lightly on the lips. To his surprise, she returned in kind, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him closer. He touched her gingerly, as if not quite sure if this was really happening or if he had fallen asleep at his desk again and was dreaming. But when Elizabeth switched off the lights and began to loosen his tie, he knew that, dream or not, there wasn't anyplace on earth he'd rather be. 


	7. A Place in the Halls of Wax

VII

A Place in the Halls of Wax 

"Damn, damn, damn," Zed swore under his breath as he marched down the halls of the MiB the next morning, looking everywhere for Agent Kay. He had thought of and checked in every practical place in the MiB, like the lab, the cafeteria, even in Burger King: Kay _did_ love his Cinni Minis. However, sensible places having been exhausted, Zed was now frantically searching in places he _knew_ Kay would never be, like the ladies bathroom, or the refrigerator in the break room. As he threw open the doors to the shower room, and after nearly being trampled by a half dozen naked, screaming agents, Agent Jay caught sight of him and hurried over. 

"Zed?!" 

"Jay! There you are! I –" He sighed at being drowned out by the screeching coming from the few agents left in the shower room. He turned to them impatiently. "You know, we're _all_ naked underneath our clothes!" he said poetically. 

Shielding his eyes, Jay quickly shut the doors. "That's _definitely _going on my top ten "Least Wanted to See" list," he muttered. 

"Jay, where's Kay? I've looked everywhere!" 

"Kay? Didn't he report in this morning?" 

"No, and I've got another riddle from the Dlrow. Have you seen him?" 

"No." 

"Any idea where he'd be?" 

Jay rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I have a real good feeling as to where he is…"

______________________

"More Srennars eggs?" 

Elizabeth looked warily at the wobbling mass of pink at the end of the spatula Kay was holding out to her. "I…think I'll stick with toast this morning, thanks," she said, biting into a piece of toast as quickly as she could. 

Kay shrugged and loaded a pile onto his plate. "They're an acquired taste, I guess." 

Elizabeth chewed thoughtfully. "Don't you have to be at work?" 

Kay shook his head. "Nope. There's really nothing to do until the Dlrow make the first move." 

Elizabeth smiled. "You know, this is kind of nice. I haven't eaten breakfast with someone in a long time." 

"Neither have I," Kay said, smiling back. "How's the nursery doing?" 

"Really good," she answered, buttering another piece of toast. "We just built a new greenhouse. We're the biggest nursery in the county now." It struck her as odd to be having a normal conversation over breakfast with her estranged husband while within the bowels of a gigantic, secret organization being pursued by aliens, but she supposed stranger things, at one time or another, had happened. There was a sudden knock at the door. 

"Come in!" Kay called. Zed and Jay entered the room, both with questioning looks on their faces. Kay wiped his mouth. "Hi fellas. What's new?" 

"Apparently a lot," Zed said, arching an eyebrow at him. "But there's no time for that now. The Dlrow have sent another riddle. I think they want to talk with you somewhere, and this riddle may lead you there." 

Kay sprang into action. "Thanks for the breakfast, Liz." 

"Be careful, Kevin." 

"I will." 

All three strode briskly down the hall. "Be careful, Kevin!" Jay imitated in a high voice, clasping his hands together and batting his eyes. Kay shot him a look. 

"Kay, we'll talk about this later, and believe me, I _do_ want to speak to you about it," Zed said in a stern voice, shooting Kay a look of his own. Kay grimaced. "But there's more important things happening right now." Jay shut the door behind all of them as they entered Zed's office. Sure enough, another riddle was shining brightly on the monitor. 

"'_We look exactly like you to the max, but when you find us we'll be covered in wax,'" _Jay read off the screen. "What does that mean?" 

"It means they need to take an English class," Kay muttered. 

"Wait a minute." Jay read over the riddle again. He snapped his fingers. "_'We look exactly like you to the max, but when you find us we'll be covered in wax.' _ Madam Tussaud's. The wax museum downtown." 

"Wonder why they would want to talk to us in a wax museum." 

"I don't know, but they just unveiled a wax statue of The Rock!" Jay said excitedly, grinning from ear to ear. He caught Zed and Kay looking at him strangely. He cleared his throat. "Come on. Aliens wait for no man." 

________________

"This is odd," Kay noted as walked into the main gallery of Madam Tussaud's. "There's no one here." 

"That shouldn't be such a surprise," Jay said, examining a very eerie looking Robin Williams. "Who in their right mind would pay twenty five dollars to see a life size statue of Susan Sarandon?" 

"Good point." 

A sudden thought struck Jay. "Kay!" he whispered fiercely. "What if one these statues _is_ the alien?" 

Kay nodded. "Good thought," he whispered. "No use in taking chances - search and destroy, kid." 

With a war cry, the duo began to wreak havoc on the unsuspecting statues. Dean Martin was decapitated by a shoe to the head, while poor Marilyn Monroe went a little bit more painfully as Jay ripped through her. Elvis never stood a chance as Kay fired a gun at him, and Bruce Lee finally met his match in Jay's noisy cricket. As Kay rounded the corner to continue the siege, he stopped cold at the sight in front of him. "Jay? You might want to come take a look at this." 

Jay followed the sound of his partner's voice and also came to an abrupt halt. There, standing in front of them, were exact replicas of Jay and Kay. A second later, the statues morphed into two members of the Dlrow. They looked exactly as Kay had remembered them – slimy, smelly, and stupid. A deep rumbling from within the creatures worried Jay.

"What is that?" Jay whispered. "What's that noise?" 

"They're laughing," Kay answered. 

"Let me guess. A laughing Dlrow isn't a good thing." 

"Nope." 

Suddenly, the two Dlrow disappeared into thin air. Wasting no time, Kay marched out of the museum, Jay in tow. "Where we going?" he panted. "What just happened?" 

"They're shape shifters, kid. They can morph into anyone they want and be completely convincing." He sighed. "I just hope we get to Elizabeth before they do." 


	8. Riddle Me This

VIII

_Riddle Me This_

****

"Coming!" Elizabeth called to the impatient knocking on her door. She wrapped a towel around her wet hair and finished buttoning up her shirt. She ran to the door and threw it open. "Kevin! What're you doing here? I thought you had to go to work!" 

"I'm back now," Kay said in a strange voice. "Come, you must leave with me now." 

"But I thought you said MiB was the safest place for me." 

"The building has been infiltrated," he said in a voice that sounded unlike Kay's. Elizabeth looked at him with suspicion. 

"Are…are you sure?" 

"Yes, now come!" Kay grabbed Elizabeth gruffly by the arm. Startled, she tore away. 

"Kevin! Watch it, that hurts!" 

"I'm sorry," he said automatically. "You must come with me without delay. You are in grave danger." 

Something wasn't quite right here, Elizabeth thought. Something was definitely off. She shook her head slowly and began to back away. "Look, I'd rather just take my chances here, if you don't mind…" 

"I do mind." 

Again Kay grabbed Elizabeth. She tried to tear herself away; her intuition was screaming at her to get away from this man – or thing – as quickly as she could. As she struggled, Kay's grip tightened to the point where her circulation was being cut off. He cupped his hand over her mouth. "Do not struggle. Come with me peacefully." 

She struggled violently as he dragged her out into the hallway, calling attention to herself from the other people passing by. Kay's grip only tightened as she resisted; now he was truly hurting her. "Do not mind her," he said to the crowd that was gathering. "She's just being uncooperative." 

Elizabeth fought to scream, doing everything in her power to get Kay's hand off her mouth so that she could shout for help. But he was simply too strong. Too strong for her. Too strong to be human. Her arm throbbed where Kay was clenching it and her ribs ached from how he was holding her as he hauled her down the hallway. She knew this wasn't Kevin. It couldn't be. She had a real fear that the man holding her wasn't a man at all – it was a Dlrow. 

___________________

Ten minutes later, Kay and Jay raced down the hallway towards holding room I-5B. Once there, Kay threw open the doors without a second thought, recklessly searching the room in some hopes of finding Elizabeth. "Liz!" he shouted as he tore the bedding off the bed. "Elizabeth, are you here?!" 

Jay searched the bathroom, tearing back the shower curtain, looking for escape holes or any signs of struggle. He noticed the bathtub was still wet. "She must have just been here!" Jay called out to Kay. 

"Well, she's not here now," Kay said in a worried voice as he sank down onto the bed. He looked wearily around the room. No signs of struggle. They must have taken her. 

"A message for you, sir," said a young man standing nervously in the doorway. "You left it here for yourself, and instructed me to bring it to you once you returned." 

Kay stood up, looking at the man searchingly. "Did the man who gave that to you look exactly like me?" 

The messenger looked at Kay strangely. "Yes sir. It was you, sir. I'm sure of it." 

Kay snatched up the message and opened it up. "Another riddle," he said. Jay read over his shoulder: 

I'm a symbol of the city, 

_I'm also the welcoming committee._

_She waits for you inside of me,_

_With a glowing light that anyone can see._

_The final battle is about to begin,_

_Gather your wits again and again. _

"Who would've thought the most vicious aliens in the universe also had a poetic side?" Jay said sarcastically. "I'm so glad that the monsters we're fighting to save the world from are so damn clever." 

"_'I'm a symbol of the city, I'm also the welcoming committee…with a glowing light that anyone can see.'_" 

"What do you think they're talking about?" 

"Statue of Liberty. New York Harbor. Let's go, kid." 

________________

Despite the situation, Jay stood at the prow of the MiB nautically mobile operational system (see: boat) with arms outstretched and a grin on his face. "Whoo hoo hoo! I _love_ this thing!" he cried above the roaring motors. The boat skidded over the harbor easily, saddling up next to Miss Liberty herself in no time. 

The first thing to greet Jay and Kay as they exited the boat were four security guards impaled upon iron shafts with looks of shock still apparent on their faces. The agents flinched. "Bad day to be a security guard," Jay commented under his breath as they trotted up to the main entrance of the statue. They both drew their guns. Kay kicked in the door and aimed at the doorway. Nothing. 

"Think it's a trap, Kay?" 

"Of course it is. We're on an island." 

They both entered, back to back so as to leave no part of themselves vulnerable, their guns still drawn. "Nothin' on this floor. Let's go up," Kay suggested. Jay nodded and they jogged up the first flight of stairs, searching the first floor. Still nothing. The second floor didn't hide anything, and the third floor looked as empty as it always had. They continued to go up and up until they were both wheezing for breath and sweating profusely. 

"This is pretty smart, actually," Jay panted. "Making us die of exhaustion before we even get to them." 

They began to search the torch area when they heard a sound no agent, MiB or otherwise, ever likes to hear; the sound of the only door in the room slamming shut and locking. Both of them were silent a moment, listening, but the Statue seemed quiet. No one was moving around. Kay sighed exasperatedly, a rare gesture from him. 

"Well now what the hell are we supposed to do?!" he cried irritably, hitting a wall with his fist in frustration. "_They've_ got Elizabeth and God knows what they're doing to her!" 

"Hey, you've said it yourself," Jay started in a cool voice. "We don't make a move until they do. They've got Elizabeth, therefore we gotta play by their rules." 

"There's got to be _some_ way out of here…" Kay rambled to himself, searching the room for any secret doorways or trap doors in the floor. Jay watched him intently as this went on for a number of tense minutes. When it became perfectly apparent that they were, in fact, trapped, he decided to intervene. 

"Hey, Kay, c'mon man, calm down." 

"Goddamn French! They can never build anything right!" 

"Look, we're gonna find her. Everything is gonna turn out all right!" 

"'All right'? Eveything's going to turn out 'all right'? Look junior, I don't know if you're _aware_ of the fact that the most vicious aliens in the universe have got _Elizabeth." _

"Man, I know that. But wiggin' out isn't going to solve anything, is it?" 

"This is all _your_ fault," Kay hissed, frowning so hard his eyes were only slits in his face. "If you hadn't dragged me away from Elizabeth this morning, I would have been there when the shape shifter showed up!" 

"_My_ fault? How is this _my_ fault?" Jay shouted, astounded at both his partner's words and the look on his face. Kay darted to and fro in the small room, his eyes still searching for escape. Jay sighed and shook his head. "Man, I told you so. Didn't I _tell_ you not to get emotionally involved? If you weren't feelin' her right now, you'd be calm enough to come up with a rational plan of action! Instead, I got a horny schoolboy for a partner who can't think straight enough to treat this as just another hostage situation!" 

It happened so fast that later on when he was trying to tell it, Jay still couldn't remember exactly how Kay had managed to push him out the window until Jay was hanging onto the railing with just one hand, dangling hundreds of feet in the air with only concrete to greet him at the bottom. Jay grasped the railing as tightly as he could and looked up into his partner's face. It was like stone. Kay had his gun pointed at Jay's head, not a trace of emotion on his face. 

"You take that back," he demanded in an icy voice. 

"I'm sorry! You're not a horny schoolboy! I – "

"Not that part. The part about this being _just_ another hostage situation." 

"Kay, you gotta believe me, I didn't mean it like that!" 

"What _exactly_ did you mean, slick?" 

"I meant we have to work together, Kay! You and me have _never _lost a hostage! We must be doing something right! If we get panicky then we don't have a chance, don't you see?!" Jay was fast losing his grip. "Remember the riddle, Kay? _'Who will it be, who will you fight'_ ? Who're you going to fight? Is it gonna be me, Kay? Huh? Is it gonna be me?" 

Kay, upon realizing what exactly what he was doing, immediately dropped his gun and grasped Jay's wrist firmly, trying to pull him up. "Give me your other hand!" he shouted. With great effort, Jay grabbed Kay's free hand and clawed for balance on the railing with his feet. Kay pulled him over the railing to safety and they both tumbled to the floor. Both were breathing heavily. Kay looked over at Jay with a look of shock and remorse on his face. He had almost killed his partner. "Jay…" 

"Help! Help me!" they both heard a distant voice cry. Kay leapt up. 

"That's Elizabeth!" he cried, looking up and catching a glimpse of Elizabeth's face in the crown of the Statue. He pulled a firing cord out of his pocket and aimed for the crown. Once secured, he shot up, followed closely by Jay. Time to gather his wits. Again.


	9. Its the End of the World As We Know It

IX

_It's the End of the World as we Know It_

The crown was rather dusty from disuse after having been closed off for a number of years. Kay and Jay slipped in silently, careful not to make any sound, lest they attract attention. Kay motioned Jay over behind some boxes and pointed. There, straight ahead of them, was Elizabeth tied to a chair. She sat perfectly still with her back straight. If she was going to be killed, she had decided, she would do it with dignity. 

Jay mouthed the words, "Where are the aliens?" to Kay, who shook his head that he didn't know. As if on cue, all of the boxes morphed into a gigantic blue mass that towered over everything in the room. 

"Welcome," it thundered as it morphed into the spitting image of Howard Dean. Jay shook his head. 

"That's it. I'm voting republican this year." 

Howard Dean meandered towards the center of the room and caressed Elizabeth's cheek suggestively. Kay's fist clenched involuntarily. "We knew you'd come to the ends of the world for this earthling. How convenient. It's the end of the world." 

"This is your final chance to surrender," Kay said coolly, drawing his gun. "Give yourself and the members of your species over to MiB and no one gets hurt." 

"The 'members of the species'? You mean the measly few hundred left hanging onto existence because your earth will not permit us to breed here?" 

"Yours is a parasitic species. You suck the life out of everything else. It would destroy our earth, and you know it." 

"No matter. It will be ours soon enough anyway. Guards! String these cretins up with the other earthling. Its time to feed the first batch," Howard Dean said with an evil smile. From out of nowhere, Bill Clinton, Ross Perot, George Bush Sr. and Al Gore raced towards Kay and Jay and began to tie their hands around their backs. 

"I _knew _it!" Jay cried. "I _knew_ Al Gore was an alien!" 

Soon Kay, Jay and Elizabeth were tied securely to a pedestal suspended over a vat of writhing, roiling blue sludge. "What is _that?_" Jay said with disgust. 

"Dlrow larvae," Kay replied, looking down at them all. "Babies only a mother could love." 

"It would have to be a pretty ugly mother," Elizabeth said, squeezing her eyes shut. "You know, I never _did _ like this city…" 

"Dlrow eat _humans?" _

"They eat anything, slick. We just happen to be the available food source at the moment." He sighed. "Never thought it would end this way. My partner, my wife and me are baby food." 

"You mean ex-wife, big guy," Jay reminded him. 

Kay and Elizabeth exchanged glances. "Actually Jay, we're technically still married." 

Jay looked at him in surprise. "Still married? So _that's_ why Elizabeth wasn't neurilized – those 'papers' you haven't signed yet were divorce papers, huh?"  

"Yep."

"Neurilized? What's that?" Elizabeth asked. 

"Memory eraser. Usually when an agent joins the MiB, all memory of that person is wiped out of the minds of all the people that agent knew. Anonymity is essential. Even family members will have no recollection of that person." 

"That's so sad," Elizabeth said softly. 

Kay nodded. "Yeah…and I knew if I signed those papers, and the divorce became final, you'd be neurilized and wouldn't remember me at all." He shifted uncomfortably, a sad look on his face. "And I couldn't face that. Divorce or no. I guess I just hoped that…someday, I could come back, and we could be a family again," he said quietly. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have. This is all my fault. If it weren't for me, you wouldn't be here right now." 

Elizabeth looked away. "You know, after you disappeared when we were teenagers…everyone told me to get over it, to forget about you, to find someone new, to give up hope of ever seeing you again. But I didn't want anyone else. Not ever, not in that whole time. But when you showed up on my front porch eight years ago, I knew you had been worth waiting thirty five years for." She and Kay held each other's gaze for a minute before she went on. "Hope - that's the same reason I didn't file for desertion. I could have, you know. You'd been gone so long…but some part of me knew you weren't dead. Some part of me knew that you'd gone back to doing whatever it was that you were doing before. I guess I…just wanted an excuse to still be connected to you somehow. I just hoped you would come back one day, and the excuse of filing the divorce papers was a semi-plausible one." 

"All this talk of divorce; sounds to be like y'all don't_ want _to be divorced," Jay commented bluntly. 

Kay and Elizabeth looked at one another. Kay opened his mouth to say something when all of a sudden the pedestal began to descend closer and closer towards the larvae. 

"Slick, you got your gun?" 

"No." 

"Cord cutter?" 

"No." 

"Knife." 

"No." 

"Well why not?!" 

"Because _you_ always carry those things!" 

Kay groaned. "Left them in my other pants. _Why_ did I decide to change? You could hardly see that soup stain!" 

Suddenly Kay heard the distinctive sound of ropes being sawed through by a knife. Surprised, he looked over at Elizabeth, whose face was wrought in concentration. She smiled at him. "Pocket knife. A good botanist never leaves home without it."

"God bless the botanist!" Jay cried as Elizabeth broke free and began to saw off Kay's ropes. She made quick work and a few seconds later Kay had broken free from his bondage and was busy untying Jay. 

"Go hide," he instructed Elizabeth over his shoulder. She nodded and jumped free of the vat, running up the first staircase she could find.  

Jay was quickly free and the two men jumped off the pedestal and onto the safety of stationary ground. "Let's split up. Just start takin' 'em out, slick," Kay instructed as he drew his gun. Jay nodded and ran off to do what he did best - kick some alien butt. Kay climbed the stairs that Elizabeth had climbed just moments before and found himself on the very top of the Statue of Liberty and Elizabeth…in _his_ arms? 

_It must have morphed again, _Kay thought as he gazed upon his clone, who was holding steadfastly onto Elizabeth. She looked up in shock. 

"Kevin! But…Kevin?" 

"Get away from him, Liz! He's a Dlrow!" Kay shouted, pointing his gun at his copy. The fake Kay also drew his gun and pointed it at Kay. 

"Don't listen to him! _He's_ the Dlrow!" 

"Liz! We don't have a lot of time! You've got to believe me!" Kay shouted over the hum of the Dlrow mothership that had begun to soar over New York Harbor. He knew it wouldn't be long before it started firing at the hapless city below. Instinctively, as in all times of crises, Kay put his hand into his right pocket and began to rub the keychain. His mind was racing a mile a minute – how could he convince Elizabeth that _he_ was Kevin, while at the same time staving off the mothership _and_ a morphed Dlrow? An idea struck him. "Of course," he whispered.  

"There's nothing that you can say or do that I cannot do as well!" the Dlrow said with an evil glimmer in its eye. "Tread carefully here!" 

Kay proudly held up the keychain. "Remember this, sweetheart? You won it for me in Brumsbruck, at the fair, remember? You said it was the ugliest cartoon dog you'd ever seen! But I've kept it all this time, because it always reminds me of you! And I bet you ten to one that the ugly, slimy, no-good son of a bitch in a sharp suit standing next you _doesn't_ have one of these!" he said with a smile. The fake Kay, seeing his defeat, swiftly aimed his gun at Elizabeth's back as she struggled away from him, but no matter how fast he was, he was no match for an old pro like the real Kay. With the pull of a trigger, the Dlrow was no longer a problem. 

Elizabeth yelped at the shot. "Jesus Kevin, don't you ever get tired of this?"  

"It grows on you," Kay said, keeping his eyes on the mothership. "But unfortunately, we've got an even bigger problem on our hands now." A beep from Kay's communicator disrupted his thoughts. "This better not be a telemarketer…" he mumbled. 

"Kay!" Jay's voice shouted from the communicator. "Check this out!" From out of nowhere, a Dlrow Salta craft flew into their view, with Jay in the cockpit. "I'm gonna take care of this little Dlrow problem once and for all!" he said as he began to blast little crafts like his clean out of the sky. He laughed; his favorite video games had always been about this kind of thing. Kay and Elizabeth raced down through the statue, all too aware that a stray shot could destroy the statue along with them. They made it to the bottom just in time to see the last Salta craft fall from the sky. 

"Pretty impressive," Kay admitted. 

Jay nodded to an invisible crowd. "Thank you, thank you," he said, bowing. 

"Kid, we got a little bit bigger problem than Salta crafts," Kay said through his communicator. Jay happened to glance up and see the biggest mothership he'd ever seen hovering right over him. His breath caught in his throat, but he swallowed hard to regain control. He had come this far; time to finish the job. 

"I'm on it!"

"There's no way you can take our the mothership with Salta fire! Its armored!" Kay said, but Jay didn't hear him. However, the truth of these words became evident as the minutes passed and the mothership remained exactly where it was, no worse the wear. 

"Dammit," Jay muttered in frustration. Just then a small hatch on the port side of the ship opened, revealing one hell of a laser gun. 

"They're going to start firing on New York!" Kay shouted. 

"Oh no you don't!" Jay screamed, turning his craft towards the open hatch. "New Yorkers have been through _enough_ shit in the past few years to be destroyed by a bunch of butt ugly aliens like you!" The open hatch was the soft spot of the ship, the only spot it could be destroyed from. Like a dragon of the twenty-first century, it was only as strong as its weakest link. 

"Jay?" the scratchy voice of Kay rang through on Jay's communicator. 

"Yeah?" 

"Look…just in case we don't make it out of here…I want you to know I'm sorry." 

"For what? Nearly throwing me off the Statue of Liberty?" 

"That too. But mostly for treating always you like a rookie." Jay paused; Kay was apologizing to _him? _ "Fact is, you're a damn fine agent, son, and I'm proud to have served as your partner. I figured this might be my last chance to tell you that. I've been meaning to say it for a long time now." 

"Kay, I'm touched – "

"Sentimentality later! Go kick some alien ass!" 

"You got it!" Jay revved up and tried to fire his guns, only to find that he had depleted all of his ammo.

"What's wrong, kid?" Kay shouted through his communicator. 

"I'm all out of firepower!" he shouted back. 

"What are you going to do now?" 

"Something I was hoping I wouldn't have to do," Jay said quietly, making sure all systems were go. Kay's eyes widened. 

"No! I forbid you!" 

"This is the way it has to be!" Jay shouted, aiming his ship directly at the soft spot. He could see the Dlrow gun warming up for its first shot and prepared himself for his last stand. He hit a button on his watch and thrust the ship sharply forward. 

"No, Jay, don't do it!" Kay bellowed at the top of his lungs just as Jay's craft made the death blow to the Dlrow mothership, inciting enormous explosions and a deafening roar. Kay and Elizabeth threw themselves to the bottom of the boat and covered their heads to shield against falling debris. Kay looked up just in time to see the mothership sinking almost peacefully to the bottom of the harbor. "Jay!" he cried, immediately standing up and scanning the surface of the water. _"Jay!" _ Kay sat down in a lump. Tears flowed freely from his eyes. "Dammit. There's no way anyone could have survived that blast," he swore softly. Elizabeth sat down next to him, crying as well. She took hold of his hand. 

"I'm so sorry, Kevin…" 

They were silent a moment, as the whole world seemed to be. Even the sounds of the city seemed distant now, as Kay continued to stare blankly out into the water. At first he didn't notice the ripples breaking the surface of the water, but after a moment, it became apparent that something – or someone – was moving out there. Kay stood up hopefully, straining his eyes to see something in the dark water. "Jay…?" 

"Whoo!" a familiar voice cheered happily. "Man, that was some show, huh?" 

"Jay!" Kay cried, quickly taking hold of his partners hand and hoisting him on deck. "How'd you ever manage to survive that?" 

"I jettisoned," Jay answered simply, wringing out his clothes as he stepped into the boat. 

"But we would have seen you…I mean…" 

Jay held up his wrist watch. "Invisibility mode, remember? Gives me some protection against flying debris. Told you it'd come in handy someday!" 

Elizabeth sighed a breath of relief. "We thought we'd lost you."

"Me? No, I'm too pretty to die."

Before he could stop himself, Kay threw his arms around Jay and squeezed him as tightly as he could. "Glad you made it, partner," he whispered. 

"'Partner'? Not 'kid,' 'junior,' or 'slick'? Hm. Yeah, I could get used to 'partner,'" Jay said. He looked quizzically at Kay. "Kay, what's that running down your face?" Jay asked, pointing to Kay's tears. Kay wiped them away, stood up straight and resumed his normal expression. 

"Some debris got in my eye. C'mon kid, lots of paperwork to fill out," Kay said as he turned the boat on and began to take them all out of New York harbor and back to the MiB. Back to business as usual. Jay sank down on a seat. 

"Man, I _hate_ paperwork…" 

Jay bounded off the boat as soon as they were tied up to the dock back at MiB, eager to change out of his wet clothes. Kay slipped the keys into his pocket and was about to exit the boat when Elizabeth took some papers out of her back pocket. She looked at them with some surprise. 

"I didn't know I had these with me," she said. 

"What are they?" 

She looked up at him. "The divorce papers." They were both silent for a moment, letting reality sink back in, not daring to even let a thought enter their heads. 

"So…what should we do with them?" Kay asked with a note of dread in his voice. 

"I don't really know…" Elizabeth said slowly. "I guess if there's a decision to be made…it has to be made right here. Right now." 

Kay smiled nervously. "You know…I…I'm not the greatest decision maker in the world, Liz." 

"Well, I'm not the best either. I've made mistakes in the past," she said quietly, looking down at the crumpled papers in her hand. "But a lot of things have changed in the past two days. A lot of things." 

"Yeah," Kay concurred softly. She looked up at him searchingly, seeking an answer in his gaze. He shook his head. "Its all on you, kid. You lead and I'll follow." 

Elizabeth continued to look him in the eyes for a moment, a small smile creeping onto her lips, then suddenly threw the divorce papers into the air, letting them soar and finally sink to the bottom of the harbor. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and smiled at him. "Well, you always _were_ a good dancer." 

Kay laughed, feeling happier than he'd felt in a long time. He pulled her close and kissed her deeply before hoisting her up on the dock, only to be met by Zed waiting at the end of the pier. Kay felt a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach as he remembered Zed still wanted to have a "talk" with him. 

"Look Zed, I can explain – " he started. 

"No need," Zed interrupted. "I know the whole thing. Aliens, kidnapping, a night of passionate love making – "

"Zed!" 

"Sorry. But I wanted to speak to both of you about something important." 

Kay hung his head low. "I know I wasn't following procedure when I wouldn't fulfill my legal obligations before I returned to MiB, but you see – "

"It doesn't matter now," Zed said, waving it off. "In fact, that could prove to be beneficial to us." They all began to walk slowly back to headquarters. The stars shone brightly in the night sky, for the first time in seemingly years, Kay noticed. "We're thinking about instating a new relocation program. New York is getting crowded. We wanted to pick both a life form and a location that were safe." He turned to both of them. "A botanist and an MiB agent could be _very_ useful to this project…" 


	10. A Botanist and an MiB AgentHappily Ever ...

X

_A Botanist and an MiB Agent…Happily Ever After_

"Alien plants. Clever." 

Jay meandered around the newest greenhouse in Elizabeth's Nursery, on the coast of Massachusetts with Kay, who looked surprisingly normal dressed in khakis and a t-shirt. "Who woulda thunk it, chief?" Jay said, poking one of the plants, who in turn snarled at him. "A botanist and an MiB agent, happily ever after." 

"The opportunity knocked, my friend," Kay said, smiling at their new line of Eudrup plants, who were cooing in the bright morning sun. "The prospect of relocation was a nice one." 

"Yeah, how's it feel to be _part-time_ Agent Kay?" Jay said with a smile, patting his partner on the shoulder. "A commuter to New York, when the need arises. I would have never guessed. And a husband and alien gardener the rest of the time. You sure you're ready for domestic life?" 

"I wouldn't call this normal domestic life," Kay said, looking over the large greenhouse, filled with cackling, drooling, or otherwise moving alien life. "Who else on Earth can say they've got a garden of aliens in their greenhouse?" 

"I can," Elizabeth said as she entered carrying two pots of Gnilings. She pecked Kay on the cheek. "A new challenge is always a good thing." 

"As is a little time off now and then. I never guessed our interests could coincide, did you?"

"No, but I have to say I'm enjoying it. There's only so much to learn about botany," Elizabeth said while arranging her pruning tools. The nearby plants cowered. "But alien botany – there's a whole new area that no one has ever touched!" 

"For good reason!" Jay said, jumping back from a purple plant that was spewing something slimy and green across the room. "So this was all Zed's idea?" 

"Yep, and a pretty good one at that." Kay grabbed a watering can and began to help Elizabeth water the Xeeneks. "I've got the best of both worlds. The best part time job on Earth, and the best lady on Earth." 

Jay smiled. "All right, I'm gonna get out of here. You need to get back to taking care of your little…alien…flowers or whatever they are. I'll see you in the office, Kay." 

"Looking forward to it, partner," Kay said, shaking Jay's hand and smiling himself. Jay waved and left. Kay put the watering can down and smiled into the sunlight streaming in through the greenhouse. He shoved his hands into his pockets. "You know, I do believe I could get used to this." 

"You'd better. I'm not losing you again," Elizabeth said in a teasing voice, pushing him playfully. He grabbed her mischievously and pulled her into a hug. 

"Was I really worth waiting thirty five years for?" 

"Yep," Elizabeth answered, holding Kay tightly. "Worth every second." 


End file.
